Sad Tomato

The tomato is sad.

He has no pants.

Product Plugs for People Who Sleep Past Noon, 2

From the folks you brought you Texting ("one part conversation, plus a whole lotta 'hey, slow it down buddy' and a dash of 'who needs a dime?') comes Twitter! And online makes it FREE!

Got something to say but no one to say it to? Sounds like a job for Twitter. Twitter— because "why think when you can Tweet?" Twitter makes posts like this a complete waste of time!

Someday an Invention

self-correcting lenses

Dear McDonald's

Please stop. It's not going to catch on.

A Letter to My Union Bay Shorts, the Button to the Shorts, and My Washing Machine

Dear Union Bay shorts, button, and washer,

What gives?