What Are You Eating Under There?

Under where?
Ahh shoot.
I got me.

Fifth Part of a Twenty-Six Part Series

Part Five*:

E

"E" stands for Erstwhile, which means "formerly" or "former." However, it sounds a lot like "burst whale," which means "to suddenly and violently vent a large, warm-blooded sea mammal." Therefore, to prevent an unnecessary mess, it is best to just say "formerly," or "former," respectively.

*nevermind, it wasn't that important anyway

Myspace Hecka Sucks

I hate myspace. Myspace is nothing but a whole bunch of insecurity plastered all over the World Wide Web. I mean... really. I don't even go there ever.

You Are Exactly Where You Are

You are above below you and below above you, this much is true, but who can be sure you are beside beside you?
It's deeper than you think, I assure ewe.

Hurricane Katrina Calls Us Into Action

I seem to have missed something in the news.

About a week ago I heard some passing comment, like “I think there is a hurricane headed toward Florida, or something.” A hurricane in Florida is nothing new; it is unfortunate, but nothing new. For a journalism major, I don’t read the newspaper a lot. And while Google news is my homepage, I usually go straight to my e-mail before the page finishes loading, so I somehow missed Hurricane Katrina entirely.

That is until I read the front page of the Union-Tribune last Thursday. “Crisis deepens in the Gulf,” “Looters run wild as rule of law fails,” “Thousands feared dead as New Orleans is to be abandoned”: it was a lot to take in on one page.

In the following days I devoured the front page articles. A picture in Friday’s paper showed three children standing in eight inches of dirty water as they waited to board a Greyhound bus headed for Houston. Something about the barrel of an assult rifle framing the shot burned the image into my mind. Armed guards are the last thing I thought rescue crews would need, but apparently some members of society saw this as a good time to steal guns and start shooting people.

The stories and images draw me into philosophical, social, and political ranting. But then I am reminded, this isn’t a life lesson; this is people hurting. Hurricane Katrina is not a philosophical question, or a political platform, not yet. Hurricane Katrina isn’t a historic event, it just happened, and people are still dying as a result. People are still trapped, still hurt, still hungry. People are still heartbroken, wondering if there is a reason to keep living.

Now is not a time to sit around reflecting on the grand questions of the human condition. Now is a time to act. But what can I do? I want to be there, be amongst the hurting. I want to help. Can my sympathy comfort a 12-year-old girl who has just lost her home, not just her house, but her home—her yard, her school, her best friend’s front porch, her cat, the cereal section with the toys at the end? Can I tell her that there is more to life than things? Is now a good time to tell her that Jesus died for her sins? Maybe I should have done that a week ago.

So what can we do?

“He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.” Micah 6:8.

We can start caring. We can let ourselves be affected. Read the paper and watch the news and realize that there is more happening here than rising gas prices. Find out what you can do, and do it.

Most of all, pray. Pray hard, pray sincerely, and pray a lot.

Pouring Out My Heart

Some say poetry isn't my "strong point."
I reply, "Oh yeah, well, you are!"
And then I throw rocks at them,
Or pieces of food, whatever's handy.

TGIS

NOT my favorite restaurant. Typing of which, last night/this morning I went to Denny's restaurant of the same name and thought to myself that I myself would like to get myself a milk "shake" of the chocolate flavor variety. However, my mind went on to myself, would not peanut butter (better) make your (my) "shake" oh so much better (butter)? Asked I therefore not of myself but to the mistress in waiting "Do you "guys" have peanut butter?"

"No," replied her reply.

And presently I ran to yon Vons and purchased about 35 servings per container. Upon returning, there finding a chocolate treat in waiting from the maiden of the same, mixed I some of said butter therewithin. Did I then partook.

And it was good.

Just Breath

That is from a song. I remember it from a commercial about cameras that take polaroid sticker pictures of guys you like, and they make you giggle in that special "commercial girl giggle" sort of way, kind of like those commercials where (in which) girls are just cracking up about how many blackheads they just suctioned out of their nose pores. I think a better title for this blog would have been nose pores. Then again, if the title was nose pores then I would have to restrict my entry to the topic of nose pores, and who really wants to type or read a blog about nose pores? I know I do and probably will someday, but not this day. No, this day I fight! That was, ironically, a somewhat nasely line from a movie, which is sort of like a commercial, only in the movie it is guys who giggle, and they are named Merry and Pippin. I should have titled this blog giggle. That would have been funny. Not laugh-out-loud funny, but funny-on-the-inside funny, like when someone says "Do you remember when we had nap time in school? We should have that in college too," but no one goes any farther with the conversation so no one laughs out loud, but most of the people who heard the comment still think it was a funny little thing to say and they quietly appreciate what was said. I agree, that was pretty funny. Yeah, s/he is a funny person. You wouldn't guess it, but after you have been around her/him for awhile, you start to notice. I submit that this has taken you longer to read than it took me to write. I win infinity.